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There is a heavenly puzzle that has gone unsolved for several decades. Will our soul or spiritual world vanish when our flesh turns to ash or decomposes at death? Or will it travel through unknown space and time? Related questions are: Does God exist somewhere in the universes? What about heaven? Before my retirement, I did not have the unconstrained mental freedom to ponder these questions. Almost for a half century, I devoted myself to a field of science and defended it, as a loyal scientist, against any unscientific imagination or statement. My curiosity, however, still welcomed some of these mysterious puzzles to tease my brain. I always quit pondering heavenly puzzles because I couldn't interpret it with my limited knowledge of sciences.

In scientific world, particularly in the field of biological chemistry, any supernatural events like divine forces were treated as a big joke. It would be "intellectual suicide" to say "I believe in God". In this secular environment, I developed a bias without realizing it. Consequently, I failed to ponder freely the heavenly puzzles in neutral ground. Nevertheless, sometimes I was able to meditate about it. The inner voice coming from my meditation was whispering to me that our soul can survive death. But no scientific data or explanation was available to keep afloat such mere thoughts on the water. From 2009, two years after my retirement, my mental constraints were mostly gone, and I had the opportunity to reflect on these questions.

I grappled with the true meaning of soul, mind, and spirit. To understand them, I needed to devour books on the subjects of modern physics, cosmology, and of mysterious spiritual experiences including "Near Death Experience (NDE)". A conclusion I have drawn so far through reading those books and discussions is that our consciousness and mind can survive even after our death. This brave statement implies that we can't deny spirituality and that it is not impossible to explain spirituality with science. I was reminded of what the late Karl Sagan had said intuitively: "Science is not only compatible with spirituality, it is a profound source of spirituality". In the process of my quest to understand science-based-spirituality, I, who used to be an agnostic, experienced spiritual awakening without realizing it. I would like to share with you how spirituality can co-exist with modern science. To do so, I am going to discuss several real examples of mysterious incidents that are 'more than just coincidence' including my own story.

Can science and religion be compatible? My answer is “yes” to tell you the conclusion first. But limited ability of people’s understanding might have caused severe conflict between them. Church clergies and people of faith still can keep their faith unchanged while they are guided by truthful scientific observations and knowledge. Who proposed the Big Bang Theory based on science? He was Geoges Lemaitre, a Catholic Church father. Galileo was the greatest scientist in his era but he never denied the Bible. He was simply rebellious against the authority of Roman Catholic Church. Who would believe that the Sun circles round the earth in these days? No one! Wouldn't we all including religious people believe Heliocentric? How old is earth? Is it 6,000 years or 4.5 billion years (BY)? It is embarrassing to note that some people still believe it as 6,000 years old. But all scientific observations and results of research collectively proved it as 4.5BY. I have no question that it is 4.5BY. Religious leaders should not take an overly literal interpretation of the Bible as the medieval Roman Catholic Church did. Galileo was against the strict interpretation of Roman Catholic leaders. Do you remember what the Pope John Paul declared? He said "Galileo was a better theologian than those who opposed him". I believe that we should admit scientific facts but keep our faith unchanged.

Scientists can be guided by the spiritual world to gain inspiration and direction. It is my personal opinion that Einstein of the Relativity Principle and Lemaitre of the Big Bang Theory are good examples of this.

One characteristic of sciences is that its knowledge always evolves. Big advancement of theoretical physics and mathematics as well as development of technology made it possible to expand our knowledge to unimaginable scale in the past, to microscopic scale and to expanse universe. That doesn't mean that knowledge gained in the past is wrong but that new knowledge accumulate on the top of it. Consequently we must keep in mind that we ought to apply new knowledge all over again when we try to interpret any physical and spiritual phenomena or in making metaphoric expression. Then we may find that previous interpretation is not necessarily right.

What I dare to attempt to do is tap into the spiritual world with new scientific knowledge. Please do not get me wrong that I am trying to access all the truths of spiritual world with science. I am knocking only on the most accessible part of it, which I will explain later on.

“A man of understanding knows there is no death. Death does not happen. It has never happened. It happens only because you are identified with the body and you don’t know yourself. Yes from the body you will be separated. If you are too identified, that separation looks like death. But if you are identified with the body, and you know yourself as the witnessing soul, as the consciousness, as the awareness, then there is no death.” An article by Anando published in the Italian Osho Times

Mysterious Anecdote 1: Sarah was hospitalized for her aneurism surgery. During this surgery, her heart had to be stopped. Instead a pumping machine operated to circulate blood stream to all other parts of her body except her brain. Her brain EEG was flat as it was kept cold and no blood was circulated. Therefore she was clinically dead for 17 minutes of surgery time. Her surgery was textbook perfect. Her surgeon visited Sarah in intensive care unit several hours later to inform her that the surgery was very successful. During conversation with Sarah, however, her surgeon took aback when he heard Sarah's story during surgery. Although she was clinically dead during her surgery, she said "Well I thought I remembered hearing something 'blow', she said.“ I thought someone said, 'Thar she blows.' Like in Moby Dick.". Sarah went on to describe what a nurse said about her marriage proposal the night before: ‘The posh restaurant, the one and-half-carat diamond ring, the swain on blended knee, the waiter who tipped over him and fell into the wine case’. She recounted her conversation word by word almost like a tape recorder! That was not all. Sarah recalled visual memories as well: 'Sarah was able to describe the perfusionist's beard, the blond tendril escaping from the cap of the newly betrothed nurse, and the bypass machine's location in the operating suite--even though the unit had been wheeled in after she had been under general anesthesia for more than two hours.'

Sarah's story was utterly impossible ‘from a biochemical, metabolic, or the physiological point of view, for her to have created any memories during her moment of suspended animation. Her brain had been devoid of any discernible electrical activity.’ What would Sarah's experience suggest? "The mind, the essential repository of consciousness, could separate from the very brain created it and live without neuronal support, like a light bulb illuminated without any source of power." Isn't it the same logic that our soul can be survived even after our death?

This Sarah’s unbelievable incident was published in Harvard Medicine 2010 (Spring). Professor Alan Hamilton, author of this article, was the one who interviewed Sarah and reviewed thoroughly all the involved surgery data and process. Dr. Hamilton was troubled in interpretation of Sarah’s supernatural incidence that could not be scientifically explained. Just ignore it? Or admit the presence of spirituality? Or mix of science and spirit to provide a big puzzle? “Can we not allow ourselves to entertain the possibility the supernatural, the divine, and the magical may all underlie our physical world? Can we not admit that we yearn to glimpse the mystery of the spirit?” If we can admit or at least ponder about this story, then shouldn’t we review all those incidences that we ignored simply because they were all unexplainable by known sciences all over again? Let’s look into another example of mysterious events.

Mysterious Anecdote 2: Colton Burpo was a 4 year old son of the pastor Burpo. His acute appendicitis was misdiagnosed as a common flu missing an immediate surgery and wasted critical time by doing nothing other than simple treatment for flu. He was transferred to a big hospital for a surgery finally as his appendectomy was ruptured. His condition got worsen and serious. Doctors informed his parents that chance was very slim for him to survive because of much over-delayed surgery. But, to everyone’s big surprise, he was recovered miraculously out of long unconsciousness several days later.

Several months had passed by and Colton recovered remarkably well, enough to share his experiences happened during his hospital staying for surgery. Colton told his dad that he came out of the body somehow and talked with angels and sat even on the knees of Jesus Christ. Pastor Burpo didn't believe what his son was talking about. Colton must have made the story, dad thought. But, Colton continued that "I saw you praying in a small room, and mommy was in other room praying and making phone calls." Dad was then greatly surprised because Colton's description was consistent with what he and his wife did: When Colton was lying down unconscious in operation room, they prayed in the separate rooms and she made phone calls to the relatives. He started to believe his son's story. Several days later, Colton was telling even more unbelievable stories: He said he met with the late sister who died in her mom's womb (his parents never revealed this to Colton). He saw his great grandfather whom he never met and heard nothing before. I am not going to describe all the stories he experienced in heaven. I refer to the original book, "Heaven is For Real". I am trying to focus just one thing here that Colton's consciousness separated from his body and he was able to see his parents in two different rooms. Colton's story is similar to the incidence of Sarah. Only difference is Colton was only 4 years old and Sarah was grown up. Scientists could not explain Colton's story. How can his consciousness be separated from his body? It is utterly impossible. "Can the light bulb be lighted without battery or electric source?" But Colton's story, "Heaven is for Real", was very popular among people. This book has been on the best-seller list of NY Times for several years and is being released as a movie.

Everything is energy. Our consciousness, life and spirit are also energy. Solid material is not more than form of condensed energies

Mysterious Anecdote III: I can't omit the story of P.M.H. Atwater when I talk about NDE. She experienced NDE as many as 3 times and she interviewed several hundred people who had gone through NDE. She accumulated relevant data more than anybody else and published several books about NDE. Atwater also experienced clearly her consciousness being separated from the body and described the process: ‘a step up of energy at the moment of death, an increase in speed as if you are suddenly vibrating faster than before. Using radio frequency as an analogy, this speed-up is compatible to having lived all your life at a certain radio frequency when all of a sudden someone or something comes along and flips the dial.’ Atwater interviewed numerous people who experienced NDE and found some common points among them: They all showed electromagnetic sensitivity; sensitivity to sunlight, sensitivity to electro-magnetic fields; some described even more weird sensitivity that TV, computer and light bulb were acting abnormally in their presence. Thus descriptions from Atwater and other individuals who underwent NDE collectively point out that energy shifts are involved in between life and death. Atwater's description follows: "You don't die when you die. You shift your consciousness and speed of vibration (energy). ---- The biggest surprise for most people in dying is to realize that dying does not end life. Whether darkness or light comes back next or some kind of event, be it positive, negative, or somewhere in between, expected or unexpected, the biggest surprise of all is to realize you are still you. You can still think, you can still remember, you can still see, hear, move, reason, wonder, feel, question, and still jokes -- if you wish."

As a bye-talk, the weight of soul was reported to be 1 ounce or 28 grams. When I read a book titled "From Intelligence to Spirituality", written by Lee Uh Ryung, the best known writer in Korea, I found the following paragraph: the change in the body weight of 5 dying patients was monitored for 3 hours and 40 minutes in Massachusetts General Hospital. The change in weight before and right after death was one ounce in average. One ounce less after death could be equivalent to the weight of the "soul". I am not sure this was officially accepted or not, but I found it interesting. This experiment may have proved that consciousness and mind come out of body after death. I wish we could monitor the body weight of NDE individuals. Would be there one ounce loss, and then regaining of that weight after their NDE?

I introduced three representative NDE stories. To understand what is involved in death or to understand it better, experiences of NDE individuals could provide crucial clues. Weren’t they once dead and back to life? Sarah’s incident was given first because it was one of the latest reported and the most carefully reviewed by academic scientists and doctors. Colton’s story was given because he was the youngest person ever reported. Atwater is an active leader in NDE research. Perhaps there could be more individuals who experienced NDE than reported, tens of thousands people perhaps. Furthermore, one report reads that a blind person from the birth saw his body including the face for the first time in his life through a NDE.

What is the focal point of conflict between science and religion? Most of people say it is about what happens after death? For several thousand years, spiritual leaders preached immortality of soul and spirit, while most scientists claimed “nothing can survive death.” To understand the conflict better, we should first listen to what scientists have been saying. Are their claims based on the whole range of the spectrum of sciences or just part of it? Let’s hear what materialistic scientists are saying.

Would mind and consciousness exist without living brain and body? Traditional materialistic scientists who view everything in this world through the window of classical physics believe that mind can be explained only by the action of brain and body. Biologists, through their reductionism (living organism to organ to tissue to cell to molecule to atom) approach, insist that our consciousnesses are formed as a result of biochemical reaction of molecules. Thus they say that any immaterial entity such as the Holy Spirit cannot be explained by science. Furthermore, they claim every process in nature is random and mechanical. The earth, other planets and universe were created by random effect, and everything occurring in there is only mechanical. This logic says there is no such thing as freewill. Thus no future can be steered by individuals. They take no quantum physics perspective but hold onto the dogma of 18-19 century sciences.

This may be a digression, but materialists’ view and strong opinion resulted in some adverse effect to human beings, although it wasn’t intentional. Rapid advancement of science and technology in the past two centuries, combined with 18^thcentury’s Enlightenment and Industrial Revolution, transformed men to be greedy and over-materialistic to bring two negativistic changes. First, endless human ambition and avarice caused indiscriminate collection of natural resources and over development of land resulting in extensive damage and rampant pollution of our precious natural environment. Second, people became over confident of science and technology believing that they can solve all the problems we have been faced for centuries. This in turn led us to leave religious beliefs to the point of denying God. This pollution of the human heart is a more serious problem than the contamination and damage of our environment. A representative example would be the disappearance of Christianity and its spirit in Europe in recent years. Isn’t the same true of America? A big parallel issue arising from the mental bleakness is that people are not seeking their own thoughts and direction but follow crowds blindly. “Who is God? Gods are man-made-stuff long ago to gain social and psychological benefits. Religion is not more than ancient relics.”

“To see the universe as it really is, we must abandon our tendency to conceptualize observation as things. The universe is immaterial-mental and spiritual.” - Richard Conn Henry

Is our reality composed of only things that we can see? It is said that we can observe only 4% of our reality or universe. Among this 4%, what we can actually see is only a small fraction of it, perhaps 1/ trillion. Therefore we are missing most things present in the reality. Can we extrapolate from this extremely small fraction to all the truths out there in our reality? Of course not! We must understand the remaining 96% before we can draw any conclusion. What is the nature of this hidden reality? That is energy. Reminding you of that even solid material is an aggregated form of energy. Thus, 100% of the universe is just energy. What is the most basic component of this energy? Known so far is quantum particles (electron, proton composite: quarks, Higgs boson). The quantum world is very microscopic -- smaller than atoms. This microscopic realm is where Newton’s classical mechanics is no longer applicable. We must focus on the energy and its basic components to understand our reality and universe. It is not possible to describe quantum physics to any extent here (it is established science but still mysterious things about it that requires further research). But I would like to point out the most characteristic properties of quantum. Quantum shows duality, particle- like property and wave-like function at the same time. Because of its wave-like property, quantum (for example, quantum emitted from me or you) is not localized in one place and can be detected regardless of distance, via a replacement mechanism, not only in California but also in Seoul, London, and even in the moon simultaneously. Speed of quantum is faster than light (Uncertainty Principle requires more careful interpretation but I am not going to go in details here). Non-locality of quantum suggests wholeness. Quantum waves and particles radiated from us are filling up the space (universe) and are entangled each other thus providing “undivided wholeness.” These non-locality and entanglement implies that we become one with each other and one with the universe. This conception of oneness is similar to spiritual teachings including Christianity. Claims that our consciousness and mind are formed only by molecular interactions in the brain and body (Body-Mind) by materialists should be reexamined through the lens of quantum mechanics. Research at the quantum dimension would provide a quantum jump in understanding how consciousness and mind are being created. As our life is energy, our consciousness, mind, and spirit are also energy. Aren’t quantum particles the most basic building blocks of energy? Thus research through quantum particles would be a key for us to understand the mechanism of consciousness formation. Such approach may find a hidden order of the universe (s). Actually, new research demonstrated that consciousness may be formed via quantum process in microtubules of brain (Quantum-Mind). It was postulated that sometimes, information could come to the brain via quantum particles from a hidden realm of the universe to lead the formation of corresponding mind and consciousness. This is not an easy notion, but have you ever experienced something unexplainable? --- “I can’t imagine that I could have done such exorbitant job myself! Most likely, God helped me.” A composer was able to compose a musical masterpiece within surprisingly short time duration (imagine Handel’s Messiah as an example); a scientist who solved unsolvable scientific problem (i.e., Einstein’s Theory of Relativity); a talented soccer player who shot a winning goal just before time expires (perhaps, Pelé as an example). I like to wonder aforementioned individuals might have communicated directly with God’s realm.

What I am trying to say is that our mind is not confined just in our brain but it can be separated from the body to exist. Once out of the body, it can be under the all-embracing hand somewhere in the universe, perhaps God’s realm. In other words, separated minds can reach God’s realm through a “bridge” or a spiritual signals can travel opposite direction to reach our brains. Perhaps such communication can be explainable by science (quantum physics). But science can’t access to the inner part within the domain of God. Internal place of God’s realm may be reachable only by theologians. My discussion is limited to the space between the God’s realm and our brains (or separated minds). I would like to emphasize that God’s realm, unbounded by space and time, can’t be opened by knocking its door with sciences including quantum mechanics.

Materialistic scientists also claim that our consciousness and mind can not affect our brains to change them, which implies denying of freewill. C.S. Lewis said in his book “Mere Christianity” that freewill is a gift from God and that people can discern wrongs from rights even from childhood without learning about them. I totally agree with Lewis. There are some exceptions in this ability of discerning right from wrong. Mental patients may not be able to discriminate them. But even mentally ill individuals sometimes can heal illness by their will or mind. We hear that meditation, praying, and hypnosis can affect our brains to bring positive changes in our health. More recent research shows that mental illness such as Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder and alcoholics can be healed by Cognitive Behavior Therapy. Alcoholics quit drinking by their will eventually with helps and treatments. Some alcoholics stop drinking when they are spiritually awakened. No question that we possess freewill and thus can steer our future to a certain extent.

According to theoretical physicist Fritjof Capra, quantum physics parallels the ancient eastern philosophies (Hinduism, Buddhism, Taoism) as he explained in his book “the Tao of Physics”. For example, belief of reincarnation in Hinduism, connectivity of everything in the universe (oneness), and “separation of thought from and existence” could be all explained by quantum physics. He said that quantum physics can explain the “oneness of the universe”. Leo Kim also describes teaching of the Tibetan Book of the Dead in his book “Healing the Rift: ‘After death, if the soul recognizes the clear light of consciousness, it becomes free and no longer needs to be involved with reincarnation. This level might be equated with heaven. Only if the soul misses the opportunities of light or the light of peaceful gods does the soul become reincarnated. Hinduism also teaches of two possible paths to take after death: one to the gods and one to Earth’. According to Kim, Christianity and Judaism subscribed a form of reincarnation until 4^th century.

I discussed that views of materialistic scientists can’t represent the whole science. We can’t visualize or imagine beyond the third dimension limiting our capability to understand the reality or universe. Therefore it seems not right to deny spiritual world by any means. It was quite embarrassing to see that some scientists went up to the rooftop and cry out their atheistic opinion; “there is no gods” in our reality or “God is dead.” Our mental posture should open wider and update our orientation with newly developing scientific knowledge. Some scientists should reexamine their tendency to brush spiritual and religious thinking off by believing firmly that spirituality is not a scientific thing. It may take times, but vigorous research based on quantum physics or even more advanced science will show the relationship between science and religion in depth and higher dimension. Until that time, we should avoid following others blindly, but keep in mind what Hermann Hesse said in his book “Damian” ; you ought to listen to your own voices coming out of the deep inside of yourself. I interpret Hesse as: “Communicate with God through your deep meditation. Only then you will get the right answer.” Science and religion are not opposite each other in their relationship. They should complement each other for better understanding and progress.

Lastly I would like to share my own mysterious experience that I believe was more than just coincidence. I wonder which side you will pick: Evolution or supernatural. The former is that I was able to survive as a result of three consecutive coincidences happened to me. The latter is to side with the possibility of God’s intervention. I think I understand evolution well enough since I had worked in a globally known evolution lab for almost 5 years as one of leaders studying evolution at the molecular level. I published several articles including “Evolutionary Puzzles” that captured attention in the field in 1980s. Ironically I had a hard time, because I was recognized as an evolutionist, when I was interviewed for the US Citizenship in early 1980s, the era where the dispute between evolutionists and creationists was at its peak in the States. I was interviewed by two interviewers at an immigration office. I expected them to question me about the history and constitution of America or politics. Rather, their first question was: “Some ridiculous evolutionists say the monkey is our ancestor. What do you think of that?” I had a very heated discussion with these interviewers that lasted more than 2 hours. They inclined to be creationists and I defended natural selection. Normally an immigration interview would take not more than 20 minutes. This was unprecedented as a US Citizenship interview! Two of my witnesses who waited for me outside became enraged that they had to wait such a long time. I felt very sorry for one of them who was not able to go back to the hospital on time to see his patients and was reprimanded. Coming out of the immigration office, I thought my citizenship application would be denied. As you can see, I defended evolutionary science pretty well against non-scientific thinkers. What I am really trying to say here is that I can handle science and religion without any prejudice.

There is no difficulty that enough love will not conquer--- Emmer Fox

One evening early in 1970, I was sitting on the sofa alone like a ghost under the light of an incandescent 100W bulb in my apartment. My room was bleak, no decorations on the wall and filled with only gloomy air. I was contemplating a trip to heaven (or hell). I could not endure the persistent extreme pains of my body and mind any more. I knew my ailing body would drive me to death sooner or later. Then why not take a short cut to get there. My situation might be likened to pulling the oxygen mask off from an intensive care unit patient when it was judged that he/she could not make it. Such a dismal thought was not clearly shaped in the beginning but getting clearer when time went by. How to say good-bye to this world? I was seeking a concrete way to say farewell to everyone that I knew. What about plunging my body onto the dark-blue ocean at the evening hour? I shivered with fear by the thought. Could I be intrepid enough actually doing it? Against the fear, I was firming my mind to choose deliberate drowning as a way to say good-bye. At that moment, the 100W light bulb went out all of sudden, likely burnt out. My room became pitch dark for a while but soon street lights streamed into my room, providing enough light to discern things. I felt strange: the bulb was burnt out at the moment I was making my final decision to throw my body into the ocean. But I concluded it was just a coincidence. As soon as I returned to my previous thought of how to kill myself, the telephone rang. This phone call was from my sister. She didn’t call me often (her last phone call was several months ago). She was concerned about how I was doing: “How have you been? Are you doing all right?” I answered: “I am doing just fine. Don’t worry about me.” I cannot believe my answer at the time to my sister even now because it was a colossal lie, the lie of lies! Wasn’t I thinking of the most terrible thing that I could do to myself? How could I answer I am fine? The phone conversation was short not exceeding 3 minutes. Because of these back to back “coincidences”, that unforgiveable suicide thought disappeared from me. Can I explain these sequential mysterious coincidences that happened one or two minutes apart? Isn’t it more than coincidence? These two events captured me totally keeping me busy to ask the same question again and again, “Is it coincidence or not?” At the same time, the thought of giving up my life before the age of 30 shattered and flew away like fine dust in the windy air. And that impulse never returned to me since then. I was firming up my heart again but to opposite direction this time: Let’s face the reality by fighting against the sharpest bodily pain and by rehabilitating my abused heart. Somehow I could start my painful life again but with a refreshed mind. In October that year, I met a beautiful and brilliant lady unexpectedly and we were married March the next year. She is now my wife of 43 years. Meeting her was my third mysterious coincidence. I was able to complete my graduate work in 1973. I owe it to my wife’s love and nursing with her medical knowledge, to magnanimous professors who supported me regardless, and to my endurance and hard work. In retrospect, the persistent pains that overwhelmed me for several years were my biggest enemy but helped me cultivate my perseverance. My life was saved by mysterious coincidences and the fortitude I acquired afterward. Furthermore I was given the most precious present in my life, my wife. And it turned out to be that I hadn’t told the biggest lie to my sister after all.

I was in my second year of my graduate school in the University of California at Berkeley. I wanted to be an expert in a field of science. But I was in the middle of a perfect storm-like the plague. I was suffering from the severe pain of duodenal ulcers that got worse and worse. I could eat only tiny amount of foods, less than 25% of normal adult consumption, because of razor-pricking- like pain of my stomach almost all the time. My mental pain was not less than physical one. My immediate family relationship was shattered because of my parent’s divorce. To make it worse, my engagement with fiancée was broken off. I was severely depressed. Naturally I was finding it difficult to carry on my graduate work. My health condition was at its worst. Body weight was less than 130 lbs (normally 160). I felt death was approaching me when I looked down my thinning thigh with no fat, no flesh, but bone and dried skin. Every bit of life supporting power seemed to be evaporating. When my health got much better two years later, one of my close friends at the university told me that I was known as the “Living Ghost” in the campus.

The most logical decision I should have made at that time was to return home in Seoul to rest completely and back to the campus with healthy body and mind. But there was no home for me. My broken family could not provide space or support for me. Another option was to have a leave of absence from the university and to stay around the campus for recovery. But no assistantships or scholarship would be given to a student on leave. Like most Korean students at the time, my only economic support was financial aids from the university.

I didn’t reveal the aforementioned two consecutive mysterious coincidences to anyone. First of all, I ignored anything that couldn’t be explained by science. If I shared with student colleagues about the possibility that such mysterious experiences could be God’s intervention or telepathy, they would have said “he has been physically sick for a long time. Now he also lost his mind. I feel sorry for this guy.” I didn’t tell my story to anyone except my wife while I was working actively as a scientist for several decades. It took more than 7 years after my retirement before I wrote my experiences under title of “Heavenly Puzzle” (this essay). I waited until I myself convinced that those two consecutive mysterious coincidences and the third one several months later didn’t occur accidentally.

Not long ago I told my stories to a scientist, who is a professor of physical chemistry. His own interpretation on my experience was like this: “The phone call by your sister at the very critical moment of your life, I think, is an intervention of divine force. The divine force could have activated the brain activity of your sister via quantum signal”. We agreed with each other on this interpretation.

Whenever I look back my past including those years of early 1970s, I feel myself being humbled greatly. I know that the blessing I enjoy now is not the result of my own efforts. I tell myself that Infinite Being loves, supports and leads me all the time - in the past, present and future. I recite Deuteronomy 8:10-19: “be careful that you do not forget the Lord your God, who brought you out of Egypt, out of the land of slavery.” ‘Otherwise, the passage warns’, “you will surely be destroyed.” Thus,Sunday worship at the church is a reminder of His presence and a moment that I express my gratefulness to Him. And worship sermons serve as a compass for my faith, morale and ethics. Without this compass I can’t find His path that I should follow. What I realized several years ago through the sermons of my pastor is that I can’t achieve what He meant us to do without being transformed myself. Which one does God prefer to see: Just a good faithfulness of an individual or people being united by loving and helping each other? Of course the latter is what He meant to be. What He wants to see from me is that I always maintain a new life with my neighbors by being changed and renewed. No peaceful life would be maintained if I am reluctant to transform. I am very grateful to see that I have been changed a bit at a time without much realization. My old lexicon read that “Love the Unlovable” is equal to impossible. But, now I can feel that the courage has been growing in my heart to challenge that impossible task. This is a kind of change unthinkable in the past. Church worship brought another precious realization that church is a community where we can study and learn about the truth of God. Truthful faith can grow only when we understand Him right. And church helps us keep that faithfulness in our heart. Furthermore, church is a place where we can practice what He wants to see from us. Even if you are provided with a compass, there is a big difference between individual and group efforts in navigating the direction to go. In this regard, a thought popped into my brain about military basic training camp 50 years ago that included a couple of survival trainings. Although we were equipped with a compass and map, it was very hard for one individual to determine the direction to get out. But through teamwork formed by the unit of 10 men it was much easier to carry out the same task. We shared opinions to boost the confidence of which direction to go and by encouraging each other in the pitch-dark environment. In retrospect, I think that those two survival trainings were His lessons given to us; we united to become one body by helping, loving and trusting each other while we tried to get out the darkness to the designated destination. In much similar way, we, as a group, should assist each other when we face the darkness in our reality. That is why the worship hours and life in the church are so important for me. Church is the very basic foundation where we can find His way and where we can transform to renew the life with our neighbors. I think God can be with us all the time by doing so.

Even though I retired I am still a scientist maintaining the frame of scientific mind. Thus, questions I explore now are “How” rather than “Why”. I am not that interested in the question of “why do nature and the universe exist? For what purpose?” But I am more interested in “what are the components of nature and how interact they each other?” This essay belongs to the latter. The former is the domain of theologians. I believe in evolution. But I don’t think life forms were created coincidentally by natural random phenomena. No one has been able to prepare even the simplest life form, a single cell, in this frenzied era of life science and biotechnology. I believe that the origin of life is from God.

Through the process of my quest and personal experiences, I realized that believing in God is not for social or psychological benefit as some scientists insist. But it is to keep our thankful minds for His grace and for our edification. Lastly, what I hope for is that contemporary scientists will show the same maturity as Galileo in the medieval times and consider human beings’ limited ability of understanding. By doing so, the conflict between religion and science will be mitigated and they can complement each other.